Albo, Plastic Scrotums, Potty Training and Smith & Wessons

By: Albo Must Go
Published On: 7/15/2007 11:03:11 AM

(Cross-Posted at Albo Must Go)

Somehow AMG missed this jem of an exchange with our hero from the Bristol Herald Courier:

I wish I were making this up. It gets worse. It also will cost you $900 - above and beyond normal traffic fines and court costs - if you display any obscene images visible by other motorists. THE VIRGINIA Code defines obscene as anything that appeals to the prurient interest in sex and includes "excretory functions."

Does this mean I no longer can play that potty DVD for my 2-year-old during road trips in our Honda Odyssey? (The DVD player is a lifesaver.) Such videos are excellent potty-training tools. One of ours has a catchy tune: "She is a super dooper pooper ... she can potty with the best ... no more diapers to get in the way ... she is simply the best." THE VIDEO shows little kids making pee-pee and poo-poo. My question now is, will showing it in the minivan land me in deep doo-doo?


This particular law - 46.2-1077.01 for you legal beagles or Internet initiated - does not bode well for several of our Southwest Virginia drivers. Take the owners of the pickup trucks I recently saw parked at the Exit 7 Wal-Mart. Both trucks had plastic testicles hanging from trailer hitches.

TRUST ME, nothing says redneck like a synthetic scrotum dangling from the rear of your Chevy Tahoe. But now it could cost you $900 ? all to pay for new roads and maintenance in Northern Virginia and Hampton Roads.

"There's no road fairy," state Delegate David Albo, R-Fairfax, told me in a telephone interview Wednesday. Mr. Albo, whose 13-mile commute routinely takes one hour and 45 minutes in Northern Virginia, was one of the driving forces behind these new
abuser fees.

True enough about the road fairy, but are bald tires and obscene images worth building your transportation budget on? I asked him.

"HAVING BALD tires is how you kill people," Albo shot back. "You might as well go ahead and point a gun at someone."

I don?t know, call me crazy, but given the choice of facing the business end of a Smith & Wesson or a Michelin, I?m taking the tire, tread or not.

J. Todd Foster, Bristol Herald Courier, Virginia Unveils New Ludicrous Rules for the Road (July 1, 2007).


Well said Mr. Foster. Well said.

Comments



Albo's Pee Pee must Go! (The Old Town Observer - 7/15/2007 5:23:31 PM)
Does this mean that little sticker of Calvin peeing on a Democrat has to be removed from Dave's car? Can't wait to see what he does the first time he gets into a rear-end accident and is charged with Failure to Maintain Proper Control (Reckless Driving) 46.2-863. Will he he a man and take the Conviction and pay the Bad Driver Fees? Or, will he try to use his political muscle and weasel out of the reckless conviction like Faisal Gill recently did in Fairfax? Well Dave, what's it going to be next time you get tagged?


Hmm (KCinDC - 7/15/2007 10:24:46 PM)
If these fees can rid us of truck testicles and those copyright-violating "Calvin peeing" stickers, maybe they're not so bad after all.


There really are truck testicles? (kestrel9000 - 7/15/2007 11:29:55 PM)
I must not get out enough...


Yes (Not Harry F. Byrd, Sr. - 7/16/2007 1:03:07 AM)