After all, not all the gay republican staffers live in Dupont Circle.  I wish I had the time, but it would be interesting to see if Kikr Fordham lives in Virginia.  I assume the former clerk does, since he is now executive director for National Wildlife.  And there must be many more.

va's motto is Virginia is for Lovers.

come on Va, we're better than what we got!

This really made me look at things in a different light.  I am just shocked, appalled, and downright offended by the hate mongers in this state.

UGH.

a ballot. 

This is the most offensive amendment I've ever seen.  And not just for gays.  Do you realise that a single woman who is a friend to another single woman might be affected by this?

I have a dear friend wants to include me in her will.  We are both single hetrosexual women who do not live with each other, but I'm wondering how this sick law will affect me and my friend as single people when we want to make descions.  I have to make my will too and I'm wondering, do I have legal rights if they pass this decronan law, to leave to my friends what I want?

And in 1997 my Partner and I moved from VA to CA. Luckily my Govt. position had good tranfer capabilities. The lack of civil rights for gays and the undercurrent of prejudice we had experienced over 3 decades eventually took its toll. Its not perfect here and I miss my old home but at least we have legal Domestic Partner Rights here and they do come in very handy. I hope to come back to VA some day to live, but right now its just too plain scary.

They say good riddance.  It really is a hate amendment.

And it really really is hurtful. For example it is hurtful for people like me who went through the women's movement and now this. Who fought against racism and turn around and find out you are the target. You wonder if your boss is like that (no, my boss is not), you wonder if your neighbor is like that and you even wonder if your physician is like that.

Or your vet. Or the guy at the hardware store.  So on.  And then all of a sudden when you're not paying attention, you find out that someone you never expected is indeed a committed homophobe.

And you wonder when you're hiking if the guy you run into is one of those people who will kill you if he finds out you are gay.  While you're listening to him talk you think this.  And you are glad you can pass for straight.

And you wonder if that kid you went to high school with committed suicide because he was gay.

I was born here.  Bob Marshall was not.  There's a rumor going around that he owns a house here, but he really lives in California.

And here is a song for all of the assholes who want me to move. 

The way I like it is, is the way it is
I got mine, he got his

Stay on the scene, like a lovin' machine
Stay on the scene, like a lovin' machine
Stay on the scene

Oh yeah. And you think about the bright and beautiful young woman who just learned that her fiance is gay.  That he had been lying and deceiving her for years.  And you want to strangle him until you remember that because of fear you too deceived others.  You too were too afraid to be yourself.

We are not a "new couple."  We have been together for 6 years, and in most states, would be considered married by "common law."  But, we live in VA, where common law is looked at as unlawful.  My family is all in NJ while Thadd's family is all in Ohio.  Where does this leave us in terms of hospital stays and medical decisions?  We're screwed.  And it's very sad.

Frankly, it makes no sense for a heterosexual couple that's free to marry not to marry if they want to have the rights of a marriage in Virginia.  It's just going to get worse if this stupid amendment passes.

And we have decided that instead of doing what they tell us to do, we will fight the good fight.

Unfortunately, it is a true example of fighting the good fight "...at our own peril."

But we will win this fight.

I've lived in Virginia nearly all my life, I love this place, and my profession would make it difficult to move.  But damn, sometimes it's tough.

I maintain because I know so many people of good will in this state - Republicans and Democrats - who understand that orientation has nothing to do with ability or worth.

I maintain because I know that this state's history is unique in the nation.  Virginia chartered America's liberties, then worked most strongly to restrict them, and finally began the process to redeem itself by electing a leader from the ranks of the formerly disenfranchised.  Virginia *is* America. 

I maintain because I know that even my opponents know that human rights will not be denied, and that love and aspirations cannot be contained.

People - friends of mine - have left Virginia since 2004 because of the relentless assault upon honest, hardworking, productive Virginians which has been perpetrated by the right wing cabal led by Bob Marshall, Steve Newman and Kathy Byron.  No Virginian sued to legalize same-sex marriage.  No Delegate or Senator introduced a bill to do so.  No judge ruled that it was possible.  And yet these ideologues chose to disparage productive Virginians and endanger the well-being and relations of every unmarried citizen, all for political gain.

This makes me angry, but it doesn’t make me despair.  I know that this amendment will fail because Virginians – a conservative people – do not want government to interfere in their families.

I know this amendment will fail because Virginians – a proud people – do no want to stain their Bill of Rights with a statement of intolerance.

And, I know this amendment will fail because we – progressive Virginians – have had enough.  We’re going to make certain that we do all we can to get our voters to the polls on November 7, to vote down this mean-spirited and harmful amendment, and to elect candidates who oppose it.

Vote No.  Vote for equality.  Vote for candidates who do the same.

Jay Squires

Jay Squires-I had no idea you posted here.  Love it, and it's just a pleasure to "speak" to you here, as well as in person.  :)

Jaime (and Thadd) from Richmond

Thanks for writing it; please post here often!

sez Lowell, and Libra responds: probably not :)

Some while before the "Abominable Amendment" showed up on VA's radar, I began to think of this whole "two Virginias" scene. My thinking crystalised shortly after Nov '04 elections.

Sometime in Sept of that year, my son (who lives in San Francisco) wrote: I'm debating re-registering myself as a Lexington VA voter, using your address. SF is gonna go blue regardless of my vote but, in Lex, I might make a diff. What do you think?

At the time, I was still spooked by the ease with which the -- supposedly "blue" -- California had tossed Davis out on his (r)ear and replaced him with Schwarzeneger, so I wrote back: "don't even think about it; CA is not as secure as you think, while VA is a lost cause ayway."

But times have changed some. This election season, my son would do better to register as a Lexington voter, since Angelides is a lost cause, while Webb is not.  My son will not be coming here for the elections -- his congressional district is running a tight race also. And it's too late to think about it for '06, anyway. But, for '08...

Towns and cities in NoVa are drowning in Dems; y'all will elect a Dem "with a finger up your arse" as a Polish saying goes (English equivalent is, I think, "with one hand tied behind your back". Prim and proper and *bland* ). If those of you who can afford it bought a small piece of property -- a hunting/fishing cabin on a couple of acres, to spend relaxing weekends -- here, in Rockbridge County... And then registered as a voter *here*, instead of Arlington or Fairfax... You mightn't even be missed there, but you would make a difference here...

So... Think on it...

Come a bit further South to Lynchburg. Register here!
Keep an eye on Lynchburg election night. If we go for Webb there is a GOOD chance the state will as well.
We carried Lynchburg for Mark Warner, Tim Kaine and Shannon Valentine. We are a "bell-weather" city!

brought me a vote no sign.  She probably got it from you guys:)

We have a cabin in the 24th, and did look into doing something like this a few years ago because of Wilkins. But there's no address there and there wasn't time.  Now I don't want to switch because where I live isn't as blue as Charlottesville, but just saying it takes a little planning.

A valid argument against is that there's a loss of authentic representation.  On the other hand, a large scale "blue bleeding" would help counterbalance gerrymandering which already artificially dilutes blue, particularly the AA vote, very effectively.

is to keep telling everyone how they're affected by this amendment.  The major point to bring up with those who may not want to recognize same sex marriage is its effect on everyone.  When talking to younger people in particular this really hits home.  Almost everyone age 30 and younger knows someone who's shacking up.  They're usually horrified when I break the news.

From a civil context marriage is purely a creature of statute.  I've seen posts on conservative blogs attacking Federal Judge J. Harvie Wilkinson for pointing out this very thing.  But of course he's right.  Civil marriage in Virginia has no sacred accoutrements.  Virginia marriage licenses have a box for civil and a box for religious, and civil marriages are performed by attorneys appointed by their local chief circuit court judges.  As a matter of fact, all judges in Virginia are authorized to perform marriages.  So where's the sacred bond all the amendment proponents keep talking about?  Anyone over the age of 18 and with a valid photo ID and thirty bucks can get a marriage license and have the ceremony performed the same day by a marriage celebrant for 50 bucks.  No waiting period, no blood test, no witnesses, no requirement that they have deep and abiding love for each other.  To be frank, a lot of marriages are ones of convenience or even for immigration purposes.  Marriages take on whatever significance the parties put into them.

The civil marriage process for heterosexuals does nothing to protect the sanctity of marriage.  You can be blind drunk and do it.  You can do it in a fit of passion, or youthful exuberance. 

The proposed amendment is nothing but bigotry wrapped up in a facade of religion.

You wonder what's wrong with certain groups in Virginia.  Look at how high the gay tolerance level is in Ireland, a country with a long religious history:
http://u.tv/newsroom...

Poll shows support for same sex marriage in Ireland

There is growing support amongst the population of the Republic of Ireland for the introduction of same sex marriages, a new survey has revealed. 

A survey published in today`s Sunday Tribune shows that nearly two thirds of voters support equality in civil marriage for gays and lesbians.

 

There are many reasons that committed older couples don't want to get married. Some, esp. women, would take a huge hit in social security benefits. Others have complex family reasons. Some divorce arrangements terminate alimony with a remarriage, etc. etc. etc.

that people may choose not to marry.  Just as an aside, for those who are shacking up to avoid losing alimony, they must be cautious because the Virginia code allows for termination of alimony in shackup situations.