I sat down and watched Star Wars Episode III yesterday. I needed to relax my mind a bit, and nothing does that better than cool lightsaber battles. It was at that time that I remembered a Daily Show joke where the GOP compared Nancy Pelosi to Darth Vader. Stewart went on to say, ?You guys have everything, admit it. You?re not a rag-tag group of rebels fighting the empire anymore. You ARE the empire.? Of course, it was a funny joke. But it got me thinking?Bush can?t have anything in common with the Incarnation of Evil in the Star Wars Universe, Emperor Palpatine?can he?So I came up with this little game.
I?m going to give a characteristic, and you can tell me who I?m talking about.
Let?s play BUSH OR PALPATINE!
Increased Executive Power to unrecognizable levels. Bush or Palpatine?
Spent almost his entire term in office in military conflict. Bush or Palpatine?
Used fear as a means to gain power and influence. Bush or Palpatine?
Ignored the Senate and Legislative Branch. Bush or Palpatine?
Constantly let dangerous villains slip through his fingers. Bush or Palpatine?
Failed to provide his troops with proper body armor. Bush or Palpatine?
Go ahead and mark down your answers.
Are you ready?
With 1-5, the answers are BOTH. Both have expanded Executive Power to ridiculous levels, both have spent their entire terms in office in military conflict (Clone Wars vs. Afghanistan/Iraq), both used fear to keep people thinking that they ?desperately needed them?, and both turned their respective legislative branches into ?formalities.? Rubber stamps, if I may. Both feel like they can do whatever they want without letting the legislature know what they?re doing. Both let dangerous villains slip through their fingers (Osama vs. General Grievous). The only difference? General Grievous isn?t real. Osama is, and he killed 3000 Americans not too long ago. Letting him get away isn?t so forgivable in my book.
What about Number 6? Well, that one belongs solely to Bush. Palpatine may have been the definition of evil in Star Wars, but even he gave his Clone Troopers state-of-the-art weapons and gear. Those laser blasters could take out Jedi, for crying out loud. Soldiers in Iraq are lucky to have body armor. Now Bush may not be evil, but he definitely appears to be a little ?out of it.?
Maybe Jon Stewart was on to something. After all, some of those comparisons are way too close for comfort. Just remember what happened to Palpatine?the people got sick of him, and Rebel Alliance was formed. Democrats in Virginia have been building our own alliance over the past few years, attracting all sorts of people. From the rural areas of Southwest Virginia, to the Suburban areas of Loudon County, Virginia is becoming the birthplace of our Rebel Alliance, and we?ve already seen plenty of Luke Skywalkers and Han Solos.
So, if you see Bush start shooting lightning out of his fingertips, don?t panic. Just call your local Jedi Knight (Democrat) headquarters, and see what you can do to help out our Rebel Alliance (no lightsaber required).
One, you're a year too late, everyone was saying this stuff last May.
Two, even as a Star Wars fan and a Democrat, I'm not comparing Bush to a Sith lord. Puh-leaze. This is the same guy who choked on a pretzel, remember?
We don't need to look to fiction for reasons to get rid of these people. The facts speak for themselves.
I just saw the Stewart joke recently, and I wasn't blogging in May. No need to call me "sad, sad, sad, sad."