My Dad

By: JD
Published On: 6/15/2008 12:58:28 PM

The silver lining of the tragic passing of Tim Russert is that its forced us to reflect on fatherhood, and probably brought about one of the most celebrated Father's Days in this country's history (it was first celebrated in the US exactly 100 years ago).  What a wonderful legacy.

I certainly am standing on my dad's shoulders, and thought I would share a brief tribute to my dad.  I welcome your stories as well.
My dad grew up in Altavista, the same town I was raised in.  For those of you who've never heard of it, first its not Buena Vista.  No, its this whole different town.  Altavista is about 30 miles south of Lynchburg on 29, in the 5th District (I believe the most conservative one in the state if you go by the Webb-Allen results).  

Anyways, dad grew up in the segregated 60s, graduating from high school in 1970.  He went to Virginia Tech, dropped out to get married, eventually went back to finish, and then moved with my mom to North Carolina, where I was born.  When I was 3, we moved back to Altavista, 3 houses down from the house he grew up in, where my grandma still lives.  

My dad, like so many of his generation, was deeply moved and inspired by the civil rights movement and the Kennedy's.  For his part, Altavista High School was integrated his senior year, and everyone rallied around their newly improved football team (which he played on), and which won the state championship.  This left a lasting impression on him, and an incurable optimism about the potential for racial progress.

My dad took every opportunity to instill in me the values he learned from the civil rights movement.  Every Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, he took the family to the local black Baptist Church, the only one in the area that would sufficiently acknowledge Dr. King.  We watched old Civil Rights movies and documentaries, read books, and talked about the values and ideals from that era, which he'd never lost.  In 1992, we traveled to DC to watch President Clinton's inauguration.  In '93, we attended the 30th anniversary of Dr. King's March on Washington.  There, I learned "We Shall Overcome," the Negro National Anthem, and other freedom songs.  We watched the speeches of Coretta King, Rosa Parks, Jesse Jackson, and many of his (and my) civil rights heroes. This was the single most memorable, formative experience of my childhood, and one that has shaped my life since.  I decided then that I wanted to somehow make a career out of helping people who were less fortunate, and, if there'd ever been any doubt, I also decided then, at the age of 12, that I was a Democrat.

Dad's idealism transcended politics or the civil rights movement, though.  He was also an old-fashioned believer in the importance of family, and in the "Protestant work ethic."

For many years, my dad worked first and third shifts to support us.  He was an insurance salesman by day, and worked at a J. Crew warehouse at night.  He was always exhausted, but every weekend he took me and my brother to the movies.

Dad was college-educated, and we were lower-middle class, but he never made as much money as he could.  In his industry, it would've been easy to always take the side of the company he worked for, to the detriment of his clients.  But he didn't, and it cost him.  He was an advocate for his clients, and was never comfortable with the bottom line for the insurance company being the bottom line.  

Ultimately, dad switched industries, and to this day works 12-16 hours a day in Virginia Beach as an auditor, this time to make enough money to ultimately retire.  He has an apartment in Virginia Beach, and every weekend drives home to my mom, who still lives in Altavista, a few houses down from the house he grew up in.  

My dad is the hardest worker I've ever known, and at the same time has an unparalleled idealism.  Nothing has tested his ideals more than the past 8 years, but at this point he merely looks forward to the next 8.  I live in Florida now, but I believe I'll fly home next January, and take my dad to DC to watch another Democratic inauguration, this time of the first black president, something he never once doubted he'd live to see.

Happy Father's Day everyone.

Comments



Terrific story and kudos to your dad (Catzmaw - 6/15/2008 5:20:13 PM)
You've made me think of my own father.  I might try to post something about him, too, in honor of his idealism.  If he were alive today he'd be tickled to death over Obama AND Clinton.  


This was a hard father's day for me... (ericy - 6/15/2008 6:47:28 PM)

I lost my dad a year ago this weekend, so I have been thinking of him a lot today.  He would be tickled by Obama too, I think.


I know the feeling (Catzmaw - 6/15/2008 6:59:08 PM)
My father died on the first day of spring when I was 17 years old.  I'm almost 51 now, but the sting is still there every March.  Please accept my condolences on your loss.  I remember that for the first few months afterwards I'd wake up every day thinking "today's the 100th day since Dad died" or "today's the 6 month anniversary of Dad's death".  It was a couple of years before it stopped being a daily thought, but I still think of him often.  Now I see his eyes and many of his mannerisms and even many of his interests in my 20 year old son.  Sometimes my son will say or do something that sends a shock of recognition through me, a little jolt taking me back to my father.  It's a nice reminder that my father isn't truly gone.  


A great story (Barbara - 6/15/2008 9:41:41 PM)
I really enjoyed reading this.  Thanks for sharing.  I'm sure you make your Dad proud; he must be a remarkable guy.

I lost my Dad 30 years ago, but I think of him all the time.  He is the one who instilled the love of politics in me.  He would be astounded to see where we are today.