I loved the column in this morning's Washington Post by Gordon C. Morse. Why? First, because he's a great writer, with lines like "Kilgore went a tyrant too far" (with his Hitler ad) and, referring to Kilgore's enthusiasm for the death penalty, "Reason, in this matter, has no role." The question is, does "reason" play a role in ANY of Jerry Kilgore's proposals?Then there's my favorite part of the whole article, on the Republican ticket's nativist demagoguery and promises to get "tough" on immigration:
Given that Virginia harbors an estimated 200,000 "thems," this could prove an expensive undertaking. But Kilgore has described the situation -- involving rampant landscaping, poultry plucking and nail-pounding -- as a "growing crisis," and GOP lieutenant governor candidate William T. "Bill" Bolling, judging from his campaign ads, appears poised to join the Minutemen.
Speaking of "nail-pounding," you totally NAILED it right there, Mr. Morse. Dead-on accurate and hilarious too!
Then there's this, again referring to illegal immigrants:
"What about 'illegal' doesn't Tim Kaine understand?" Kilgore demands in his commercials. Were Kaine to get down to that level, he would probably respond, "The part where Republican families, Republican business owners and Republican contractors pay them to be here."
Again, exactly right. Like when Kilgore supporter Smithfield Foods employs illegal immigrants, or when a company Kilgore used to lobby for (KBR) does so as well? You know, I was thinking about this the other day. I wonder: has Jerry Kilgore ever had an addition put on his house? Had some landscaping work done? Been to a restaurant? A car wash? Like, in his entire LIFE? Well, guess what? If he has, he's almost certainly employed illegal immigrants. And he got the "low low prices" he demanded as a result, I betcha. So, everybody, raise your hand if you want to pay a LOT more money for your next meal, or your next home improvement project, or whatever, just so Republican politicians like Jerry Kilgore can "get tough" on those dastardly landscapers and poultry pluckers?
On another topic, Morse pounds Kilgore on his ridiculous promises -- broadcast endlessly on our TV screens -- to spend "surplus dollars" to do all kinds of great things for Virginia. Excuse me, but are those the "surplus dollars" that Kilgore rails against when he bashes Mark Warner and Tim Kaine for the historic budget reform package that Kilgore opposed? So how can there be a "surplus" for Kilgore to spend if he doesn't believe the money should be there in the first place? As a good Republican, isn't Kilgore planning on turning that ill-gotten "surplus" back to us, the taxpayers? Unless...he's not a good Republican after all? Could that be why he won't sign the State Taxpayer Protection Pledge?" Hmmm...
Here's Morse on the "surplus" and other Kilgore absurdities:
It was a logical and factual absurdity, but then so are Kilgore's assurances that new roads can be built without new state money, that property tax reductions can be achieved without affecting local services, that tuitions can be contained without additional state support of higher education, that referendums will make for a functional substitute for legislative action and that peace will reign in the valley if we just get the Hispanics out of Herndon.
Great stuff. Even better, it has the virtue of being true. The question is, how does Jerry Kilgore say this stuff day in and day out without busting out laughing?